Money is not the basis of a successful marriage

12-2-2009 | IslamWeb

Question:

Asslam Aliakum, I am a muslim and wanted to marry a muslim girl. Her parents laid a condition that If I buy a brand new house, they would accept me for marriage. After two years of hard working I was able to buy the house. I went back to them this time they laid a SECOND CONDITION on me that I will have to put the house on her name before they could agree upon this marriage. I offered to submit the house on both of our names, but they refused and insisted to transfer the house 100% on her name. Based of the information, please answer the following three questions. Allah bless you for helping me. Ameen. 1. Can her parent put the SECOND CONDITION on my since I already fulfilled thier first condition by buying the house? (she is very upset with me because she says I should have submitted the house on her name 100%, but remember I did offer to transfer the house on both of our names. If I weren't sincere with this girl, I wouldn't have offered it. She would have been the part owner of the house and her half would have been aprox. $31,000.00 I really love this girl and wanted marry her. Now i am unable to eat or sleep properly because she has stopped all kind of communication with me no phone, sms or email.) 2. Is this right to be upset with me? (it seems like her parents changed this marriage into a BUSINESS DEAL, gave money and staut enormous importance and appeared to be very materlistic OR they just wanted to secure this daughter financially in case of a divorce in the future. 3. Could this marriage have been sucessful since If I had married her these conditions?

Answer:

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

 

Islam legislated marriage for great purposes and urged people to facilitate it, therefore, obstacles should not be put to prevent it. The parents of this girl should not break the promise which they made to you after you fulfilled the first condition about the ownership of the house. Allaah urged people to fulfill their promise and dispraised breaking it.

In addition to this, the girl should not get angry because of your refusal of their second condition. So, we advise you to negotiate with them in a good manner and if they insist on registering the house on the girl’s name and you did not want to do so, then you should leave her and look for another girl to marry, and do not think about her or be attached to her. You do not know what is good for you. For more benefit, refer to Fataawa 84544 and 92500.

However, if you agree to those conditions, then this marriage might be successful with those conditions but the less the expenses of marriage are, the more blessed the marriage is.

For more benefit, please refer to Fataawa 90124, 87514 and 85394

Finally, we advise you to perform Istikhaarah prayer in regard to marrying this girl; for more benefit on how to perform Istikhaarah prayer, please refer to Fatwa 81434.

Allaah Knows best.

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