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Women: A Source of Happiness or Pessimism?

Women: A Source of Happiness or Pessimism?

Some might say: How could a woman be a great reason for happiness when she is described in some Prophetic Hadeeths (narrations) as a source of pessimism?

In order to understand this and know the truth about it in the Religion of Allah The Almighty and the guidance of His Prophet,  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention )  the discussion must be derived from the definite Sharee‘ah (Islamic legislation) of Allah The Almighty.
Here is the clarification for this issue:
It was narrated on the authority of ‘Abdullaah ibn ‘Umar, may Allah be pleased with him, that the Messenger of Allah,  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention ), said: "There is neither infection nor belief in evil omens. Pessimism is in three: a woman, a horse and a house." [Muslim]
Another narration reads: "If there is something true of pessimism, it is in a horse, a woman and a house." [Muslim] 
In Tuhfat Al-Ahwazi Sharh At-Tirmithi, Al-Mubaarakfoori  may  Allah  have  mercy  upon  him mentioned the Hadeeth (narration) narrated on the authority of Ibn ‘Umar, may Allah be pleased with him, where the Messenger of Allah,  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention ) said: "Pessimism is in three: in a woman, a house and a mount." Commenting on the Hadeeth, he said, "Pessimism is the opposite of optimism. According to the Hadeeth, pessimism occurs in three: in a woman, a house and a mount."
 
An-Nawawi  may  Allah  have  mercy  upon  him said,
There is a difference of opinion among scholars regarding the meaning of the Hadeeth. Maalik  may  Allah  have  mercy  upon  him along with other groups of scholars, are of the view that the apparent meaning is intended here. Allah The Almighty may make inhabiting a certain house a reason for harm and destruction. Likewise, taking a specific woman, horse or servant may be a cause for destruction by the Divine decree of Allah. The Hadeeth means that pessimism could occur in three things, according to the explicit indication of the Hadeeth, which reads: “If there is pessimism about something, then it is in…” 
Al-Khattaabi and many other scholars are of the view that exception is intended here. This means that belief in evil omens is prohibited unless one has a house and he dislikes to live in it, a woman and he dislikes to live with her, or a horse or servant. In such a case, he should leave all this through selling, divorcing the woman, and so on. 
Others said that pessimism about a house occurs when it is narrow and the neighbors are evil and harmful; pessimism about a woman occurs when she is infertile, offensive and a source of doubt; pessimism about a horse occurs when the man does not use it for making Jihaad or when it usually stops and declines to walk or when it is expensive; pessimism about a servant occurs when he has evil morals and does not fulfill appointed tasks. It was said that pessimism in this context means unsuitability.
Al-Qaadhi  may  Allah  have  mercy  upon  him said, "Some scholars said that the aforesaid Hadeeths in general introduce three cases: first, what is not harmful and there is neither specific nor general related habit, is to be neglected and the Sharee‘ah forbade one to believe in it, and this is like belief in evil omens. Second, what is harmful in general and rarely occurs, such as an epidemic. One must not go to the place where it is found or depart from it. Third, something that is harmful to a specific person and not in general, such as a house, a horse and a woman, it is permissible to flee from them. Allah knows best." 
Al-Mubaarakfoori  may  Allah  have  mercy  upon  him mentioned the Hadeeth narrated on the authority of ‘Aa’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, which reads: "Bad morals are a source of pessimism." [Ahmad, At-Tabaraani and Abu Nu‘aym] 
It was narrated on the authority of Anas, may Allah be pleased with him, that a man said: "O Messenger of Allah, we were in a house in which our number and our wealth were many and turned to a house in which our number and our wealth became few.’ The Messenger of Allah  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention ) said: ‘Leave it, for it is unfavorable.’" [Abu Daawood] Abu Daawood and Al-Munthiri did not judge the Hadeeth. 
It was narrated on the authority of Ibn ‘Umar and Sahl ibn Sa‘d, may Allah be pleased with them, that the Prophet,  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention ), said: "If there was to be pessimism about something, then it would have been about a woman, a mount and a house." [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]  
The meaning of this Hadeeth is that if we supposed that there is pessimism about something, it is about these three things. The Prophet,  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention ), meant to highlight the invalidity of pessimism in a form intended for exaggeration. This is similar to the meaning of the Hadeeth in which the Prophet,  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention ), said: "If there was to be something to precede Fate, it would have been the evil eye." Accordingly, there is no contradiction between this and the general negation of belief in evil omens, as it is mentioned in the Hadeeth: "There is neither infection nor belief in evil omens."  
You may say: How can we understand this and the Hadeeth that reads "Pessimism is about three things" together?  
Scholars reconciled both as follows:
Regarding the Hadeeth which reads: "If there was to be pessimism about something, then it would have been about a horse, a house and a woman ", Al-Khattaabi  may  Allah  have  mercy  upon  him said, "This exclusion is meant to nullify belief in evil omens that was dominant during the pre-Islamic era. It is as if he said: "If one of you dislikes living in a certain house, accompanying a certain wife or keeping in possession a certain horse, he should leave it." 
According to another opinion, the actual meaning of pessimism is not intended; rather, pessimism about a house occurs when it is narrow and the neighbors are evil and harmful; pessimism about a woman occurs when she is infertile and offensive; pessimism about a horse occurs when it is not used for performing Jihaad or when it declines to walk and it is expensive. This view is supported by the Hadeeth narrated on the authority of Sa‘d, may Allah be pleased with him, where the Prophet,  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention ), said: "There are three reasons for human happiness: a righteous woman, a spacious house and a good mount. There are three reasons for human misery: an evil woman, a narrow house and a bad mount." [Marfoo‘ Hadeeth (a narration of a Companion attributed to the Prophet ( sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention ))] [Ahmad] [Ibn Hibbaan and Al-Haakim: Saheeh]
The wording of another narration reads: "…..an easy mount and a spacious house." [Ibn Hibbaan]  
The wording of a third narration reads: "There are three reasons for human misery: a woman whom you dislike when seeing her, who hurts you with her tongue, and whom you do not trust as regards your honor and property when leaving her; a bad mount that bothers you if you beat it, and if you do not beat it, it does not help you catch up with your friends; and a narrow house that has few utilities." [Al-Haakim] 
The author of ‘Awn Al-Ma‘bood said, "Al-Haafith ibn Hajar said, '‘Abdul-Razzaaq reported in Al-Musannaf on the authority of Ma‘mar that he said, ‘I heard some people interpreting this Hadeeth saying that pessimism about a woman is infertility, pessimism about a horse is when it is not used for performing Jihaad and pessimism about a house is when the neighbors are bad.’"

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