Spoiling the relationship between a wife and her husband
Fatwa No: 92056

  • Fatwa Date:4-5-2006 - Rabee' Al-Aakhir 6, 1427
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I have fallen in love with a girl and she too loves me. I know this is sinful but now it is too late as our feelings for each other are very deep. We wish to get married but her parents forced her to marry someone else and for her familys sake she complied. She wants out of the marrage but it is impossible for her to get a divorce as a her family wont allow it and wont let her out the house. I pray so much and do zikr and beg Allah for forgiveness and to help us so that we may be happily married. I even pray for her husband that he finds a loving wife because he too is affected by this because his wife doesnt behave like a wife to him. She has not even touched him once. The girl is scared that she is being cursed for not obeying her husband who she despises a lot and just wants a divorce so that she is not sinning by not being a proper wife. Please advise on what we can all do to put an end to all this. I want to get married to her - I have asked Allah on many occasions.


All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.


It is forbidden in Islam for a man to establish an affectionate relationship with a marriageable woman, and such a relationship with a married woman is even more sinful and more serious. If both the man and the woman know that this is forbidden and still do it, then this is an even greater sin. So, you should take the initiative to repent and not be lured by the whispers of the devil that repenting is too late because it is never too late.

If you continue this forbidden relationship with this woman, you are breaking her relation with her husband, and this is yet another grave sin. The Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam said: "He is not one of us he who spoils the relationship between a woman and her husband." [Abu-Daawood] Some scholars  may  Allaah  have  mercy  upon  them are of the view that the marriage of a man with a woman for whom he was the cause in spoiling the relationship with her husband is not valid. However, the majority of the jurists  may  Allaah  have  mercy  upon  them are of the view that such a marriage is valid but the person is nonetheless sinful. Nonetheless, you should be careful and you should stop this relationship.

Pious and righteous people should endeavour to reconcile between this woman and her husband, as there is good in reconciling, and this is something possible. Indeed there are many spouses whose relationship was very bad but ultimately, they reconciled and had a good marital relationship.

You should rather think about another pious woman for marriage as there are so many of them, and it might be that you will succeed in this. Allaah Says (what means): {… and it may be that you dislike a thing which is good for you and that you like a thing which is bad for you. Allaah knows but you do not know.} [Quran 2:216]

Finally, it should be noted that if divorce takes place between that woman and her husband without you causing this divorce, then there is no harm, Allaah willing, in you marrying her.

Allaah Knows best.

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